How to Last Longer
in Bed

Start with the exhale. It needs no preparation, it works from the first minute, and you can use it without changing anything else you’re doing. If that isn’t enough, slow the rhythm right down before you try anything cleverer — most men skip straight to a trick and stay at full speed. The rest of the in-the-moment moves are further up this page. What none of them will do is hold up on a night when you’re tired, stressed, or have gone a while without: the underlying reflex decides that, and that takes weeks rather than an evening.

It depends which part. The muscle work has a floor: about six weeks at ten minutes a day is, in the course’s own words, the bare minimum to change strength in any muscle, and six in ten men report a significant improvement by the end of that block. The arousal work runs on its own clock — several stages, a couple of weeks each, and you move up only when the one before it is steady. The full program is eight weeks. There is no version of this that takes a week.

Usually because nobody ever taught you the two things that decide it: where your arousal is at any given moment, and whether the muscle that could hold the line has ever been trained. Neither is a flaw and neither is fixed — they’re untrained, the same way a language you’ve never studied is untrained. If you think it’s more than that, and it happens within about a minute in every situation and has for months, that’s a different question and premature ejaculation is where it’s answered.

Seven, and they do different jobs: two that keep your nervous system on the calm side, one that tells you which tool to reach for, one that builds the muscle acting as a brake, and three that train the response itself. They’re set out one by one further up this page, in the order the course teaches them — which is also the order that matters.

Everything on this page is the natural version — breathing, relaxation, awareness and muscle training, with nothing applied, swallowed or worn. It’s slower than a spray. It’s also the only route that still works after you stop using it, because what changes is your own response rather than how much you can feel.

Yes, and it’s the backbone of the solo practice above: you climb to a level, slow down or stop, let arousal fall, then climb again. Two things separate it working from it wasting your time — do it at the levels below nine instead of repeatedly testing the edge, and pair it with breathing and relaxation instead of gritting your teeth. The squeeze technique is its cousin and belongs at the top of the scale rather than throughout.

Yes, and the course teaches it as a technique in its own right. While you’re close — kissing, foreplay, penetration — you scan for tension in your jaw, hands, thighs and glutes, release whatever you find, and stretch your exhale out to six seconds or more. Nothing changes on the outside: no pause, no explanation, no announcement. For anyone who doesn’t want a conversation about this first, it’s the most useful thing on the page.

Common, and it’s a pacing problem rather than an erection problem. Dropping from an eight straight down to a two tells your body sex is over, and the blood flow follows. Step down instead — eight to six, not eight to two — keep some light stimulation going, keep a little tone rather than switching everything off, and make the exhale longer than the inhale. If losing your erection is the pattern rather than the exception, that’s a different page: erectile dysfunction.

They do something, which is why they sell. Thinking about something else works and costs you the evening; you’ve left the room, and usually your partner can tell. Numbing sprays and thicker condoms trade sensation for time, and the effect leaves when the product does. We don’t work with medication and never have. If you need something for tonight, use the moves further up this page — at least they don’t ask you to feel less.

Short, and mostly guided: a lesson, one audio session — breathing, relaxation or a body scan, depending on where you are — and the muscle block with a timer counting the reps. Three days a week there’s an arousal practice as well, which runs longer. The app tells you which day you’re on, so that isn’t a decision you have to make.

No. No device, no weights, no gel, no gadget. Everything on this page is your own body and about ten minutes. The app itself is paid, and that’s the whole list.

Yes. You can cancel anytime from your account settings — no questions asked, no retention calls.

Two ways. Email support@the.coach and a real person on our team gets back to you — usually within a day. Or open the app, go to the Today tab, tap your profile, and hit Support. Both land with the same people.